Not So Bright, Recently

Ok, guys, coming at you from a long overdue period of no posts (again).

 

Last time you heard from me I was basking in what was my brand new marriage. We have now been married almost 3 months, and I have just one thing to say:

 

Anyone who says marriage is easy, is lying.

 

In a card someone gave us on our wedding day, the inside read that marriage would be the hardest, yet most rewarding, thing you'll ever do. Those words could not be more true. Marriage is hard, ya'll. I can't say it enough. 

 

Now, you're all probably thinking "you've only been married 3 months and you're already having problems? Won't last long then..." but don't misread what I'm saying. I still love it. It's still fun. It's still a big sleepover, most of the time. But lately, things have been rough. And it's mostly, if not fully, my fault. You see, women do this thing where when we're frustrated we take it out on the people we love the most. And, more often than not, the thing we're frustrated about is something that we can't even control. So here's a few examples of what we've been dealing with in the Bright household:

 

Car issues - A few weeks ago, my car broke down in the middle of town. Dead, nothing, not a movement. We finally figured out that the pulley from the oil pump broke off, causing the timing belt to jump, which, in English for those of you who don't speak car, is VERY BAD. We were faced with the choice of a new engine or a new car. Neither of which are in our newlywed budget.

 

House issues - I've said this before, and I'll say it again, I am a creature of habit and plan. I have to have a plan for everything. And I am very slowly learning the lesson that things almost never go as planned. Upon approaching Tanner with the mindset that we needed a 5 year plan and to immediately discuss when we will buy a house and where, and going to see a few houses, then realizing we could never afford these houses, I launched myself into a full blown stress-fueled meltdown. I'm telling you guys, I have been the biggest monster the past few weeks.

 

Vacation Bible School - Anyone who has ever been involved with Vacation Bible School knows that it is probably one of the biggest events of the year for a church. And you know that it can be incredibly stressful. Mom and I have taken on the teens again this year, and while this can also be extremely rewarding, it's a job in itself.

 

Financial Adjustments - Upon my car breaking down, I realized that we need a much larger emergency fund. But instead of being a normal, calm person, I threw myself into a panic and assaulted my dear husband with graphs, spreadsheets and statistics that only showed him how bad we are at saving money. This was, yet again, a bad move on my part. I'm pretty sure that if he ever hears the words "We need to talk about money" again he'll pack his things and go live in the Pro Shop at the country club.

 

Volleyball - As if I didn't have enough planned, I decided to coach for a new volleyball league our town is hosting. My team is a group of 13-15 girls who have either never played, or think they're Misty May-Treanor. There is no in between. Thanks to the moms who think their daughters are stars, and the eye-rolling and general laziness, I will begin praying that I have only sons should Tanner and I ever have children. (Again, I'm being dramatic. The girls aren't really so bad.)

 

Church - One of my first blog posts was about my home church. We were going through some things, and as much as I wish I could say it's gotten better, it hasn't. This has been a huge issue for Tanner and I, and one that we're still working through.

 

I go into detail about all of this not to whine, or make it seem like my life is harder than others. It's more or less a therapy, and it's also to give you some insight as how to not do marriage. Through all of this, I've gotten so wrapped up in my "struggles" that I have completely forgotten to thank God for everything he's blessed me with. So here's a list of the things I am thankful for from the past month:

 

-Family being close by to car pool with, and even let me drive their cars (thanks, Mom!)

-My husband for being SO, SO, SO patient with me, and gently telling me that I need to chill out and that not everything is about me, and that I need a major attitude adjustment

-The sweetest mother-in-law who does everything she can for just about anybody without an agenda or expectations

-My dad for always promising to do what he can

-Our landlords for always answering their phone, should we ever need anything

-The house we have that protected us from that crazy storm Friday night

-The company I work for, for letting me have an extremely flexible schedule

-Good friends, who let me vent and cry to them just about any time I need

-Ray's Hydraulics who have promised they can fix my engine without buying a new one

-My stepdad for letting us use his washing machine and dryer

-Our crazy cat

-Some of our church family that always have an encouraging thing to say

-The Gillis men who seem to know everything about anything with a motor and wheels

-God for giving us this crazy, wonderful life that we get to share for the rest of our lives

 

And so, so many more.

 

Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."  So we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper; I will not be afraid. What can man do to me?" Hebrews 13:5-6  

Again, I've been a most unpleasant person to deal with recently, and for that I am sorry. Why is it that it takes such a bad thing (or things) to happen for us to realize how good we have it?